Image by Carniphage.
Insure Against Monster Attacks with the Weirdest Insurance Ever
Insurance is vitally important but not always that interesting.
Some companies, though, go beyond what is expected on them, and offer some distinctly bizarre alternatives.
Insure Against a Virgin Birth
Simon Burgess doesn't seem like the sort of person to have a wacky sense of humour.
An established British insurer, not exactly the industry most given to hilarious shenanigans, he has nonetheless revolutionised the ways that people insure against some of the naughtier acts of God.
In 2006, the company Simon worked for insured three sisters from Scotland against the possibility of a virgin birth. The payout if they were to give birth to the second coming of Christ would be £1 million, presumably meaning that the Messiah would be private-school educated and born in a specialist hospital rather than a manger.
All the money went to charity, but he was allegedly forced to cave under pressure from the Catholic Church, who weren't exactly keen on a joke that mocked the foundation of their entire existence.
It's got to be a pretty safe bet to take on that insurance package though – my reckoning puts the odds at either 0 or 110,000 million to 1, depending on how cynical you are.
Insure Against Alien Abduction
Another big winner, but these are no gimmick – according to one company, it has already paid out million dollar claims for being abducted by aliens!
Usually these are given out as joke presents. Two lucky recipients, though, managed to convince the insurance company to pay out in full...
...at a dollar a year, over the course of a million years, or up to the point where they died, whichever came first.
That's...that's just mean. First the aliens, and now this!
Insure Against Vampire Attack
Another one from Simon – if you're running a hotel, you can insure all your guests against vampire, ghost or werewolf attack for £500 a year.
If the company pays out, you could get £1 million (weird how this nice, round, easily memorable number keeps cropping up!).
Doesn't matter if your hotel is hundreds of miles from the traditional haunts of werewolves and vampires, they'll insure you anyway.
Because obviously this is just a publicity stunt.
Still, it's clearly a mutually beneficial stunt – and it works, just look at me, still writing about it years after the policy was issued!
Insure Against Losing in a Casino
Seems pretty odd that a casino would insure against gambling losses.
Seems even weirder that a casino would do it for free.
Of course, in reality the "too-good-to-be-true" offer provided by Devilfish is, well, too good to be true.
The payout is about 10-15%. Know what this means? Devilfish have made easily more than 10-15% profit off their customers.
Call me crazy, but I don't like those odds.
Even one of the people handing out these insurance policies described the people buying them as 'feeble-minded' – ouch!
What do you think? Feeble-minded, or well prepared?
As well as your normal policies, like pet insurance or overseas kit insurance, would you like to be secure in the event of a zombie attack, or have health insurance in case of spontaneous combustion? Let me know in the comments!
Author Bio: James Duval writes posts for JBI Insurance Brokers, who specialise in arranging niche (but not weird!) insurance cover for expats, those in the military, and travelling.